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He’s so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Inspector Javert. He was my guard when I was in prison. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then when I was released, I helped out this prostitute named Fantine who was totally gorgeous but then she died, and Javert was like, weirdly jealous of her. Like, if I would blow him off to rescue Fantine’s daughter, he’d be like, “Why did you break your parole?” And I’d be like, “Why are you so obsessed with me?” So then, at the barricade, which was a student-led revolution, I was like, “Javert, I can’t invite you, because I think you’re a policeman.” I mean I couldn’t have a policeman at the barricade. There were gonna be students there fighting tyranny. I mean, right? He was a POLICEMAN. So then his mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then he left the barricade because I let him go, and he came back afterwards for justice, all of his hair was cut off and he was totally weird, and now I guess he jumped off a bridge.
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